Undependable..

Wow..I'm realizing how undependable I am at blogging.  I try and tell myself that I am way to busy and its alright..I'll do a better job after all the marriage stuff is done (two weeks by the way!)  I really want to do a better job.  I LOVE OTHER BLOGS!  I love how people write, how the feeling comes off the screen and hit me!  I can not do this.  Writing has never been something I was good at, despite my best efforts.  But yet here I sit still trying to sound witty, engaging, loving, funny, sad, and profoundly happy in each different blog.  I go back and read them and think WOW..you really suck at this Heather.  Oh well...click, click, click...I just continue to type away.  Why? Because it makes me feel better.  I like writing things in this blog because I get to express my feelings...I don't really have anyone who reads these LOL!  So I can say whatever it is I want.  It's like having a diary, but I don't feel like a 12 year old doing this.  Which is silly because what are blogs anyway but glorified "public" diaries for anyone to see.  I wish I could make more if an impact though on people..write wonderful blogs that a bunch of people read and comment on.  Where I move people.  But that's selfish and kind of..of what the word I'm looking for..hmmm what did I tell you, creative writing + Heather = Fail LOL.  The word is right there just hidden in the fog of mind..my rusty steel trap of a mind ;)  Oh well you know what I mean, I hope.